I am pleased to see that everyone is following government guidelines and not congregating in large groups around my blog.

Please wash your hands at least three times after reading this and then go and count your toilet paper collection.

It is recommended that you stockpile enough paper to wipe your arse for at least one year.

I am more depressed about this shit than I can ever remember being before. The overall idiocy of the general population had stopped surprising me until this, it has reached a new nadir.

Now wash your hands.