The other day, I heard a great definition of a conspiracy theorist.

Or rather, it was the antithesis of a conspiracy theorist.

In order to call another person a conspiracy theorist, in that denigrating and patronising way, you would have to believe that there have never been two people of ill-intent in positions of power, who sat down and talked about their ill intentions.

When it is said so clearly and plainly it is easy to see the ridiculousness of the designation. The people who are in positions of power are probably there because they want to be in a position of power. They probably want to pretend to themselves and to others that they are not doing it for that reason, but I would argue that point. By their deeds ye shall know them is a common saying, while their true intentions remain hidden, even from themselves.

In the same way that people join the army under any number of pretexts, it is made plain when you pass through that door, that you will be expected to pick up a gun and possibly/probably, shoot someone dead. And, they join the police to do good and help administer justice, never because of the uniform or to drive fast with impunity and bully members of the citizenry.

Because, what kind of person would do something with that kind of motive? Few would dare admit that to themselves, and yet, why has it been necessary to bind the police with so many procedural ties and rules? It surely isn’t because they have always been pure as the driven snow. No, they have so many rules imposed on them to curtail the abuse of power that is part and parcel of the role they have assumed, the job attracts the type of person who loves that power. Bullies and psychopaths, barely held in check by a complaints procedure that creaks under the workload.

Knowing all this, can you still think that politicians have not assumed that position for the end result that they are enjoying, that they do it to benefit their community? From there it is a small step to the certain knowledge that, at some point, two or more may meet and discuss how to further their plans, ways to increase their personal power over others. The medicine that they crave.

After all, in some way, beneath the evil carapace and behind the painted-on smile, they began as humans. Therefore, they probably function as we do, as you do. Is there anyone who has never spoken to another person about ways to cheat, or to obtain an object by deception? Colluded and conspired on a plan with less than pure motives? And you would claim humanity, a shared and common platform with those others on their pedestals, wouldn’t you?

So, why is it so hard to accept that they are not so squeaky clean? Why would you ascribe to them greater honesty than you possess, and why would you believe that they might have enough money, property, or prestige that temptation doesn’t strike?

Imagine the level of temptation on offer to a person in power at this ‘unprecedented’ time. With the promise of power and money beyond the wildest dreams of any normal person why would someone who craves such things say no to the devil. With billions being thrown around and the usual checks and measures being swept aside as scrutiny is waived ‘due to covid’, they are like pigs at the trough.

Too harsh, you might think. I do not believe our politicians would do such things simply on the promise of some slightly elevated position on the ladder, you might cry. My answer to your pathetic bleatings? How short is your memory, do you not recall the feeding frenzy that was the MPs expenses debacle? The items that the thieving shitbags helped themselves to in the name of serving their constituents, and they still get re-elected. So you do know what they’re like and you still want them to be there, serving themselves and their friends until the pot is empty, until the foodbank is the busiest place in any town.

Well, we are nearly there. There is ample evidence that they are still filling their boots at the expense of the world, and people still think that a withheld vote is a threat to these arseholes. They get paid whether in opposition or in government, it’s a job for life and, like teachers, they are never held to account for their shortcomings.

There seems to be a huge movement going on worldwide, there is a power grab going on and there is a massive distribution of wealth. The scale is, dare I say it, unprecedented. The actors who have been placed in government are jockeying for position at the table, and, just as they did at their expensive schools, cosying up to the bullies to save their own worthless skin. The lack of a voice in opposition to the covid lies demonstrates perfectly the lack of spine among them, standing in line waiting for their stipend, repeating the script they’ve been given.

There is a massive conspiracy going on here, there are several, and not least is the conspiracy of silence.

The spread has been rapid and complete, no amount of muzzles can stop it now.

UCL is a poisonous and corrupt organisation that exists to spread lies and to provide pseudo-scientific backing in order to further oppress and enslave the people of this country. I would suggest that no one with any kind of conscience would remain there having seen what they have perpetrated in the past year, in the full knowledge that it is all lies.

Whatever, I remain proud to be a conspiracy theorist. Or, as I prefer to call myself, in an attempt to escape the pejorative term, a person who is not blinded by a criminal lack of intelligence or the psychological abuse of those elected to empty my bins.

Conspiracy theorist is a rather snappier title, and I do not give a single fuck who calls me that, just don’t call me late for dinner.